Amara

Outline of narrative elements
 * Setting**: San Francisco, CA


 * Main Characters**: An American Family with 4 kids (triplets, plus one) and me.


 * Plot**: In 2005 I moved to the USA to spend a year as an Au Pair. My English wasn't good but I was able to communicate. When I saw that the first family in my profile was from San Francisco, I didn't measure the consequences of taking care of 4 kids. I just wanted to live my dream of living in the most beautiful city in the USA.


 * Climax**: During our trip to Hawaii, I worked 24/7. I got really angry and when we got back to SF I had a terrible fight with my host mom. I ended up running away from the house (something I'm not proud of) and had to live with a friend to make money to come back to Brazil.


 * Ending**: I spent 2 months in a very nice house where I worked with only 2 children. She paid for my ticket to come back to Brazil and years later, I contacted the first family to apologize for my behavior.

Peer editing of narrative outlines - Gustavo I do not think that "unclear" is the right word. I got the idea perfectly, but it would not hurt if some details were added.
 * 1. Is there any aspect of the outline that looks unclear to you? **

I mean, even though I have an idea of what might have happened, I am still wondering what "having a terrible flight with someone" means in this case.
 * 2. Can you think of an area in the outline that needs more development? Do you have any specific suggestions? **

This story has potential, Âmara. I mean, you ran away from somewhere! My humble suggestion is: the climax was a crucial moment, so give it a smooth progression and fill the gaps by adding a couple of details. I know an outline is not supposed to tell everything, but wouldn't it be nice if it gave a hint of what were your expectations for the trip or what went through your mind when you decided to leave, for example? Also, it would be cool if you explained how all that enhanced your learning experience in the United States in the "ending" bit. That is basically it. No joke, though: we should make a movie about that. Hahhaahah... a movie would be fun!!!! Âmara.
 * 3. If you have any other ideas and suggestions, write them here. **

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